It’s crazy to think how fast my time here is going, and it’s funny because some days I feel like I am looking at the clock all day and others are over before I blink. I was coming up the elevator today and immediately went through the now normal routine of badging my ID to enable access to my floor and I thought back to the first day I rode up the elevator to meet my unknown manager (and manager’s manager too actually) in an unknown department that I had zero clue about. Timid, shy, and severely out of the loop, I wondered why and how I ended up here. Six weeks later, I am proud to say that I feel less timid, more confident, and certainly more informed about the department I have been working in. As much as getting my departments switched at the last second before beginning was a pain, it enabled me to really start from scratch here. I have to confess that I did spend a bunch of time in the month before coming here googling and researching what the heck medical liasions do so I wouldn’t seem unqualified when I started my supposed internship in Medical Affairs. However, I was forced to not have any preconceived ideas about Medical Writing, as I literally had not a clue what people did here! It has been a growing and learning experience for sure- I really wish I did get to have the opportunity to practice writing like a medical writer, but they didn’t have anything that I could help work on. I have talked to enough people about the process, that I have a good understanding of it, but listening and doing are two very different areas.
I met this nurse in the parking lot of my CPR class last night and we got to talking and her career path got me thinking a bit about my own. After getting her nursing degree in her 30’s, she worked in the hospital for about 6 years and then decided to leave and work the 9-5 life in infectious disease. She wanted a change from hospital life. But her face lit up when she said that she was going back (hence the CPR class). She said she hated 9-5 Monday through Friday. She said she didn’t have time for a life too. Although the 3, 12 hour shifts are hard she said, you get to have a life the other half of the week. Although I have no experience with this life, I have gotten a taste of the 9-5 life. By the time I snag a tired work out in after and make dinner, all my body wants to do is lie motionless in bed. It just got me thinking about scheduling and trying to incorporate a life into a career as I know I will want to continue playing squash, start a family, and get involved in community organizations as I get older. I guess it’s just food for thought, but it made me rethink how beautiful everyone paints the 9-5 life.
On a random note, I haven’t worn my sensor in about 3 days, and I feel lost without it. I feel like I don’t know how to manage my diabetes anymore without it. I’m not saying that I am dependent on it because I promised myself I would not get that attached, but I just don’t know how I did it for 18 years without it. I think that I would subconsciously check my blood sugar without going through the process of asking myself if I need to or not because I was accustomed to 10 checks a day…but now that I have had a taste of not checking 10 times a day and only when I need to eat meals or with exercise due to the precise readings of the CGM, it is hard to switch back to that mode. And last night I dreamt that I was man who was drinking a juice box….which is officially the weirdest dream I have had trying to wake myself up to tell myself to check. I clearly was envisioning myself with a juice box in my hand… why I was a man I have zero idea though! These dreams are actually starting to scare me because I what happens if I stop having them and am not on the CGM? I think it’s pretty neat how the brain works especially during sleep to subconsciously try and wake up someone who should not be sleeping. It freaks me out and I am very appreciative of my sensor being able to catch me around 80 rather than my fun times at 50 last night the consisted of me taking apple juice to the face from the container and a few of vanilla oreos I had as I hadn’t gone to the grocery store all week to replace the peanut butter crackers. The importance/necessity of grocery shopping upkeep and diabetes I think is a whole different story I am still working on and I won’t get into!